View high resolution
View high resolution
Taking beastrogen to become a wretched creature
Taking pestosterone to become a nasty nuisance
is there a difference between jelly and jam?
yes (bonus if you elaborate in the tags)
no they're the same thing
other??
One of the really fun and interesting things about writing a polyamorous romance as someone who is ambiamorous/polyamorous is finding new ways to make sure the narrative hits the expected genre beats without just sort of... mushing it into a pre-existing monogamous romance mold, which is what I'm afraid happens a lot of the time.
Trust me, it was my job in the publishing house to make them fit that mold. I hated it.
Reading other poly-centric romances, I can always somewhat tell when someone is writing polyamory from a sexual fantasy aspect (zero shade; I'm here for all the group sex) without actually considering how it functions as a relationship dynamic, which can often come off as... well.
It's lacking for me as a romance.
Erotica-wise, it's fine. But it misses the romantic beats for me that I want as a polyamorous-leaning person.
There's so much emphasis on the polycule and never the individual dyads within the larger relationship.
For example, in a triad, there are actually four relationships to handle.
The dyad between A + B.
The dyad between A + C.
The dyad between B + C.
And the overarching relationship between A + B + C.
With monogamous-leaning authors or authors that've been pressed into conforming to the pre-existing genre beats, there's a tendency to treat the relationship as a homogenous mass where everything is fair and equal, and you treat all your partners the exact same way.
And I get it. It's easier to write everything as peachy-keen and to have external conflict be resolved with either acceptance or a brave confrontation.
But it doesn't always land for me as someone who wants to see my style of love represented in the genre.
In healthy polyamory, either closed or open, each relationship is unique in its own way. Taking the example of a triad again, the way A acts with C likely differs from how A acts with B.
And that's a good thing!
Because C might not want the same things as B, so trying to treat them both the exact same is a surefire way to make sure someone isn't getting their needs met, and that will lead to conflict.
Polyamory isn't striving for equality between partners but rather equity.
What are your individual needs, and how do I meet them, as well as meet the needs of my other partner(s)? What do you want from the larger relationship as a whole? How do we accommodate everyone without making someone feel neglected or uncomfortable? How do we show this in the narrative? How do we make sure character A isn't just treating B the same as C in every interaction? Do they ever fall into that pitfall? How do they remedy it?
It seems like common sense when you write it out like that, but it's a major pitfall I see time and time again. The characters never alternate their approach between partners, if there's any focus on the individuals at all.
The other major telltale thing I've noticed is that taking time to be with one partner is seen as a step down from the "goal" of the greater polycule.
The narrative is framed in such a way that they might start out with individual dates, but the end goal of the romance is to eventually be together 100% of the time all the time, and wanting individual time alone with any one partner is somehow "lesser."
Which is the goal of romance in monogamy, but it's not the goal of romance in polyamory.
Granted, you do need to end on a Happy Ever After or Happy For Now for it to fit the genre requirement. And a nice way of tying that up is to have everyone together at the end as a happy polycule all together all at once. I'm not disputing that as a narrative tool. I'm just pointing out that there's a tendency to present those moments as the sum total of the relationship when in actuality, there are multiple relationships that need to end happily ever after.
The joy of polyamorous love is the joy of multitudes. It's the joy of experiencing new things, both as individuals and as a polycule. If you're not taking care of the individual dyads, however, your polycule is going to crash and burn. You cannot avoid that. So why, then, is there such avoidance of it in stories meant to appeal to us?
Is it simply inexperience on behalf of the author? Or is it that they're not actually being written for us? Is it continued pressure to meet certain genre beats in a largely monogamous-centric genre? All of the above?
Either way, I'm having fun playing around with it and doing all the things we were warned against in the publishing house.
I'm having fun with Nathan and Vlad enjoying their own private dynamic that is theirs and theirs alone. I'm having fun with Ursula and Nathan being so careful and vulnerable around each other. I'm absolutely 100% here for the chaos of Vlad and Ursula without a chaperone. And I'm here for the chaos of Vlad and Ursula together and Nathan's fond, loving eye roll as he trails after them, too enamored to tell either of them no because where would the fun in that be...
Anyway. Don't mind me. Just getting my thoughts out while everyone else is in bed.
View high resolution
fresno nightcrawler flock
View high resolution
“The Blue Iris”, from Andrea Zanatelli’s embroidery series
in spanglish you don’t switch by word, you switch by phrase.
it’s not:
“[first part of the sentence in english], [second part of the sentence in english], mi amor.”
“[full english sentence], querida.”
it’s:
“[first part of the sentence in english], [segunda parte de la frase en español], mi amor.”
-
also miles is boricua, miguel is mexican. they have two different accents and use different vocabulary for certain words.
also miles is “nyourican” - a puerto rican native to new york - while his mom is directly from the island, so there are differences there, too, because his spanish is more influence by new york english. 
here’s some good references that aren’t google translate (which usually pulls from spain, a country that speaks vastly differently from latin america)
here have some random videos on different slang/spanish accents:
-
in spanish most words are gendered, so most feminine words end in a and masculine/gender neutral words end in o. adding ito/ita makes something cuter, smaller and more affectionate.
spanish nicknames that aren’t “mi amor”
also spanish is a language that uses adjectives as terms of affection both cute ones and ones that might sound insensitive in english
and like most languages that are not english, spanish has multiple ways of saying i love you.
see also:
 and, of course, they can vary regionally too.
please use this because i have read a lot of really well written things that take me out of it because the use of spanglish is terrible. don’t just go on your presumptions that spanish/spanglish works in the same way that english does.
- signed your friendly neighborhood afro-latina
hey y’all , hate to start the day off begging but i just got hit with some overdraft fees and could use some help getting out of the red + a little extra for gas money. would really appreciate if y’all could reblog this and possibly send some spare change my way ♥️🖤
v: @Nia-Pia
c: $NiaPia4
paypal: @niapia48
thank y’all so much
"the pandemic was"
"we've just been through a pandemic"
"back during covid"
I know it is incredibly risky and all but you know people are just allowed to wander through graveyards
Graveyards are places where bodies are buried with ceremony and with loved ones and with love, and maybe some pre planning. Loved ones get to visit and add flowers, and the place is somewhat peaceful and meant to be.
A site of a mass death where people all died and bodies were not recovered is a different matter. It is a mass grave.
There are also certain mass graves that aren’t allowed to be visited (for instance, site of the Edmund Fitzgerald). And there are gravesites which are blocked off to the public specifically because they have been desecrated. (Some Indigenous gravesites for instance.)
The purpose of visiting a mass grave when you have no relation to the people there, and are just fascinated with the way they died, is something that carries a sort of exploitation and disrespect to it.
There’s a lot more nuance to the things I’m saying than I can convey right now but I hope this gets across the distinction at least.
I think that we should stop criminalizing pirating and I wish the government would give everyone $50,000 every month no matter what and I think that people should stop treating sex workers like they're scum of the earth and I wish that we all cared a little more about artists and musicians and dancers and writers and I think we should stop acting like gender and sexuality is the same for everybody and I think we should all steal a little more
tsa once took my nonna’s eyelash curler. she is 5 feet tall and when this happened she was like 80.
Reminds me of this picture that went viral a while back.
the brush bronzewing is a small pigeon endemic to southern australia. shorter and stockier than it’s close relative, the common bronzewing, it shares the notable ‘rainbow’ iridescent pattern on the wings, found in both sexes. these birds feed primarily by foraging on the ground for seeds, berries, and insects. unlike many other pigeons, they do not congregate in large groups, and are often found as single birds or in pairs.
